Nun Chelhtu

 "How many times have people used a pen or paintbrush because they couldn’t pull the trigger?” – Virginia Woolf

Ka ngaihtuah, ka ngaihtuah ṭhin; hringnunin a hmelhmang chhe tak a hmuh khum lai leh, chhûn êng a an hun thim ber an hman lai te, malsawmna ruahpui a sur lai pawha an hlimna tuikhur a kang lai te, harsatna leh manganna te'n chau hnêpa a thin phar tawh hnu a, beidawnna leh lungngaihna te'n an han ṭhìng zui lai a thihna hruihrual  aia ziakfung leh lehkhapuan chuh hram hram ṭhin, thu leh hla hruihrualin a zem hnan tlat te hringnun hi! 

Ni, ral khat aṭanga hringnun an han thlir thuak paw'n, naupan laia thawnthu tlângkawmna lar, “tichuan hlim takin an awm ta a”(and they lives happily ever after) tih kha thawnthuah bâk a awm thei tak tak lo tih chu tuma hrilh nawn ngai lovin an nuna lungngaihna tâwp chin awm lo leh, midangin an hringnun an zawh tâwp dan an hmuh aṭang ngawt paw'n an chiang a. Nun hian hlimna ai mahin lungngaihna keng tam zawkin, hlimna te hi chuan a rawn pawlh ve zeuh zeuh ṭhinin a lang zawk hial a; chu thil runthlâk tak chu Robert Burns paw'n hmân hmânah khan,

“Such is the tempest has shaken my bosom,

Till my last hope and last comfort is gone”

tiin a lo au chhuahpui tawh a ni. 

Hlim hmel lan tir nazawng hi an hlim vek kher lo ang hian, pâwn lamah chuan nun tluang tak zawh ang maiin lang ve ṭhin mah se, chhûgrilah chuan an awngrawp a, manganna te chuan buanin, nui ri karah lungngaihna awrawl an zep a, tute emaw bula inbun ve hawk hawk duh mah se, hriatthiamna nena lo dawngsawng tur erawh khawvar lam arsi ang pharh an nih leh si ṭhin avangin ngawih an chuh a, an mittui thupin nui hmel lantir an thlang a, chu hmaithinghâwng chuan zawhna tam tak an mahni ngei pawhin a chhânna an hriat loh chu an chhân a ngaih loh nâna an pumpelh kawng sialtu mai a ni.  

Mahse an tâna engtik lai pawha awm reng leh an lungngaihna ngawi reng a, zawl dawh taka lo dawngsawng fo tu a awm; chu chu an ziakfung leh lehkhapuan a ni. An hlimna leh lungngaihna luangliam, an thinlungin a dawl zawh tawh loh chu ziakfung chelhin lehkhapuanah chuan an luantir a. Chutah chuan midang mit mei vên a ngai lova, khawvel dân khirh leh  khauh,  sakhaw serh leh sâng ten a chelh bet tawh lova, an thinlunga ‘aw’ awm chuan thu a sawi ang ang chuan an ziak chhuak a, an khawvel nunrâwng leh huatthlala tak chu thlawh bosanin zalênna ramah an lêng ṭhin.

Chu hmun chu amah leh a kutchhuak te avanga kan sûn nawn fo tur Mafaa khan, ‘Chawlhna tuikam’ tia lo sawiin “He chawlhna hi awm lo sela chu kan dam chhûng hian vawi eng zat tak thi nawn hman tawh ang maw? ” a lo ti rêng a nih kha. Romantic poet, vanduanain a nun hi chênna atan a lo ruat lâwk emaw tih mai tura nun bumboh tak lo zawh tu John keats a paw'n a nun hrehawm tak atâ hahchawlhna lo zawngin:

“Can death be sleep, when life is but a dream, 

And scenes of bliss pass as a phantom by? 

The transient pleasures as a vision seem, 

And yet we think the greatest pain's to die”

a lo ti chhuak lawm lawm a. Amah ang bawk a mi khawhar, a vânglai taka mual liam ve ta Lalzova pawh khan a khawharna leh a maltlat nun chu lo au chhuahpuiin: 

“Chung tûra nî aw a liam zan tlaiah, 

Siangah an lâwi mi hrailêngte zawng; 

Kei chu khawiah nge siang ka lawi ang, 

Thangvân chhawrthla êng ruai hnuaiah maw ni? ”

A lo ti ve ṭâwk ṭâwk a nih kha. 

Hringnun tuipui zauah hian tum ram leh zin chhan mai bâkah, hringnun lawng karfung min chelhpuitu tur kan duhin kan mamawh vek a, chutiang ni suh se he tuipui zau tak hian awmzia a nei lova, harsatna leh lungngaihna kan tawh zo zai te hian awmzia nei lovin, a thlâwnin kan tuar dawn a ni si a. 

Chuvang chuan kan tum ram te hian karfung min la chelhtir hram hram a, karfung min chelhpuitu te hlei hlei hi an ni tuifawn so but but karah pawh beiseina min pe leh tlat ṭhin tu te chu. Kan tân an hlut êm avang hian an tel lova zinkawng zawh kan zuam lova, anni chân ai chuan thil dang chân pawh kan inhuam em em ṭhin. Mahse karfung min chelhpui reng dawn emaw kan tih lai hian arsi thlâwk ang maiin mual an liam leh thut ṭhin a, chu thil runthlâk tak avanga tawrhna chu American poet Edgar Allen Poe chuan mawi lutuk tak maiin a lehkhapuanah a lo luan tawh a: 

“While i weep, while i weep! 

O God! Can i not grasp

Them with a tighter clasp? 

One from the pitiless waves? 

Is all that we see or seem

But a dream within a dream? ”

 Kan mi hrâng Vankhama ngei pawhin hmânah khan zin kawng zawhpui zel atan a duh em em a chânna chu nâ tiin a zâm a lo zal ve dêr tawh a ni ngei ang, kâwla ni lo chhuak tur pawh hmuh hreh em em in: 

“Chhuak lo zawk se vawiin ni chu, 

Ngaihlai Parte zamual a liam

Luaithli nûlin chawnbân darzâm ka vuan… ”

A lo tih ve bawk kha maw. 

Heng mite hian an hringnuna ruahpui vân-âwn a sur nasat ber lai khan, ziakfung ban lovin hruihrual lain an nunna lo chhat ve ta se la, a nih loh paw'n silai dâwt chu an lu a chuktuahin na hre hman lova liam hlen lo thlang ve ta se la'ng zawng, vawiin hian thu leh hla mawi, nalh leh thinlairil fan chhuak khawp a ril hi kan nei tam lo ngawt ang. An chênna hun leh hmun te chu inang lovin, an inkârah kum tam tak leh tupui zau tak tla mah se, an lunngaihna leh an tawrhna, manganna leh an mittui luang zawng zawng te kha ngawi renga liampui lova, mawina neia an zam chhuah avang hian heng mite hi suar khata tla, hmuh theih loh khawvel ropuia chêng za an ni. 

Thu leh hlaah rau rau pawh thinlung hneh leh lungkuai ber ber te chu, lungchhiatthlak leh mittui surtir thei an ni tlangpui a, “ka hla duh ber chu maw.. ” tia ‘ber’ sawi tur ni si, kutzung ṭang thliak nghauh nghauh pah a kan lam chhuah hla ho ngat hi chu lâmpui chiam chiam chi hi a tlem pharh loh paw'n a awm lo tluk a ni ang. Kan duh ber ber te chu kan lungngaihna kan sawi chhuah thiam loh sawi chhuak thei hla te an lo ni fur zawk a; amah PB Shelly ngei khan a lo sawi alawm, “Our sweetest songs are those that tell of saddest thought” tiin. 

He khawvel hi buaina leh lungngaihna, elrelna leh intaina hmun. Mi lian te'na duhtâwka an inlek parhna, sum leh pai, in ropui, nihna leh sawipuitu ṭha nei ve lo te tâna hmun chêp tak. Mittuiin luan zawh tik nî a neih lohna hmuh; kan lo dam ve ringawt pawh hi ‘helna' nihna ramah chêng mah ila, hmun pakhat, bîk bona hmun nuam, chawlhna tuikam, hmun reh leh ralmuang, nun chelh chhan tur kan vaih lai ber pawh a kan nun chelh tlat tu, kan natna na ber pawh midang tâna damna a lo nih theihna;  lungngaihna paw'n mawina a neihna leh, tu tân pawh a tuihna thar a awm rêngna hmun 'thuhlaril' (literature) leh a chhûnga an hringnun rawn luan luh tir tu te hi an awm lo ang tih ka va hlau ṭhin em! 

Chutiang ni suh sê, kei leh mi tam tak, thu leh hla hruihrualin a zem hnan te hian khawvel êng hi ka hmu leh tawh hauh lovang.